Jeff Arch

Mommy got sick. And it happened just like that. There's nothing anybody could do. It isn't fair. There's no reason. But if we start asking why, we'll go crazy.

Well, I'm gonna get out of bed every morning… breathe in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won't have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breathe in and out… and, then after a while, I won't have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.

Well, how long is your program? Well, it was a million tiny little things that, when you added them all up, they meant we were supposed to be together... and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home... only to no home I'd ever known... I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like... magic.

Well, I'm not looking for a mail-order bride. I just want somebody I can have a decent conversation with over dinner, without it falling down into weepy tears over some movie.

She looks like my third grade teacher, and I hated my third grade teacher… wait a minute, she IS my third grade teacher!

I'll tell you what I'm doing this weekend, I'm getting laid. It's the 1990's and nobody's getting laid. I'm the only man in America who's getting laid this weekend and I haven't been laid that much. Six girls in college, maybe seven.

Jonah, listen to me. You don't know Victoria. I hardly know her myself. She is a fat mystery to me. She tosses her hair a lot. Why does she do this? I have no idea. Is it a twitch? Does she need a haircut? Should she use a barrette to keep her hair out of her face? These are things I'm willing to get to the bottom of. And that is why… I am DATING her. That's all I'm doing. I'm not living with her. I'm not marrying her. Can you appreciate the difference? This is what single people do. They try other people on and see how they fit. But everybody's an adjustment. Nobody's perfect. There's no such thing as a perfect…

I never did. I mean, the whole idea of an afterlife... But now, I don't know. 'Cause I have these dreams. About your mom. And we have these long talks about you and how you're doing, which she sort of knows, but I tell her anyway. So what is that? That's sort of an afterlife, isn't it?

Not dinner. Not necessarily on the first date, because halfway through dinner you could be really sorry you asked them to dinner. Whereas if it's just a drink, if you like them you can always ask them to dinner, but if not you can just say, "Well, that was great," and then you go home, if you see what I mean. I wonder if it still works this way.

Loss of Spouse Support Group. Chicago Cancer Family Network. Parents Without Partners. Partners Without Parents. Hug Yourself. Hug a Friend. Hug a Shrink. Or work. Work hard. Work will save you. Work is the only thing that will see you through this.

Don't mind him. He's just a guy who's lost his wife.