Ordell Robbie

Here we go. AK-47. The very best there is. When you absolutely, positively got to kill every motherfucker in the room, accept no substitutes.

My ass may be dumb, but I ain't no dumbass.

You can't trust Melanie. But, you can always trust Melanie to be Melanie.

What the fuck happened to you, man? Shit, your ass used to be beautiful!

He put himself in a position where he was going to have to do ten years in prison, that's what he did. And if you know Beaumont, you know ain't no god damn way he can do ten years. And if you know that, then you know Beaumont's gonna do anything Beaumont can to keep from doing them ten years, including telling the federal government any and every motherfucking thing about my black ass. Now that, my friend, is a clear cut case of him or me. And you best believe it ain't gonna be me.

Well I got a problem with spendin' ten thousand dollars on ungrateful, peanut-head niggers to get 'em out of jail, but I did it! And how small was that jail cell, motherfucker?

You know, she's just one of the bitches I got set up. I got Mel over in Hermosa Beach and I rent this little place for Simone over in Compton where you stayin', and about four blocks away I got this young 19-year-old country girl named Sheronda. I found her on the bus stop two days out of Georgia - barefoot, country as a chicken coop. I took her to my place in Compton, told her it was Hollywood.

Hell, yeah. To her dumb country ass, Compton is Hollywood. Closest she's ever been, anyway.

My money's in that office, right? If she start giving me some bullshit about it ain't there, and we got to go someplace else and get it, I'm gonna shoot you in the head then and there. Then I'm gonna shoot that bitch in the kneecaps, find out where my goddamn money is. She gonna tell me too. Hey, look at me when I'm talking to you, motherfucker. You listen: we go in there, and that nigga Winston or anybody else is in there, you the first motherfucker to get shot. You understand?

Now that there is the TEC-9, a little cheap ass spray gun made out of South Miami. They retail for 380, I get 'em for 2, sell 'em for 8. They advertised this TEC-9 as the most popular gun in American crime. Can you believe that shit? It actually says that in the little booklet that comes with it: the most popular gun in American crime. Like they proud of that shit.

Jackie can tell me any story that comes into her pretty little head, just so long as at the end of that story she hands me my motherfucking money.

Now, the thing is, I ain't never done business with these Koreans before. Now I ain't worried, because, by and large, Asians are very dependable, they don't want no trouble. You might argue with them about price and shit, but you don't need to worry about them shooting you in the back, you know what I'm saying?

Well, I'm gonna sell the other two tonight. There's this group of Koreans over in Koreatown, starting' this neighborhood watch thing. They need some weapons so they can show the neighborhood niggers they mean business. Now, I'm gonna sell them the other two machine guns, all right? The problem is, I ain't never done business with these Koreans before. Now I ain't worried, 'cause by and large Asians are very dependable, they don't want no trouble. You might argue with them about price and shit, but you ain't gotta worry about them shooting you in the back, you know what I'm saying? But I got me a rule: Never do business with people you ain't never done business with before without backup. And that's why I need you: backup.

I told you, man. She's my fine little surfer gal. You know, she ain't pretty as she used to be and she bitch a whole lot more than she used to; but, she white.

Goddamn. In all the time I've known her, I ain't never heard her scared like that. Usually, she too cool for school.

Definitely know a lot about that! Look here Louis, I got to run out for a little while so uh, if you like gettin high so much, why don't you hang out here with Mel' n' watch a little TV.

See I get high later on when I come back, see I get high at NIGHT, when I get through with all my business.

You seen Max Cherry in the dress department where we… Man look at me when I'm talking to you! You see that muthafucka in the dress department when we bout to get a half million dollars and you don't think nothin' 'bout him being there?

Come on, man, you know how they do. Black man shows up with ten thousand in cash, the first thing they want to know is where I got it. Then they're gonna want to keep a big chunk of it, start talking that court cost shit. Fuck that noise, Jack. I go through you.

Fellow named Beaumont. He got arrested for drunk driving, they wrote it up as possession of a concealed weapon. Dumb monkey-ass had a pistol on him.

Man, they fuckin' with her. They callin' that shit 'possession with intent.'. A 44-year-old black woman caught with less than two ounces, they callin' that shit 'intent'. The same thing happen to a movie star, they call it 'possession'.

Man, you put this bad boy on a flick, every motherfucker out there will want one. I'm serious as a heart attack. When them Hong Kong flicks came out, every nigger in the world had to have a 45. And they didn't want one, they want two. 'Cause all them niggers want to be the killer!

Look here, look here, look here. I tell you what - when we get through fuckin' with these Koreans, me and you go to Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles on me. Think about it now. That 'Scoe's Special, smothered in gravy and onions, side of red beans and rice, some greens. That's some good eatin'.

Oh, you know what? I'm real sorry about that, man, but I had to be somewhere all of a sudden. I figured, well, shit, Louis ain't had no pussy for a while; so, I thought, let him kick it here with Mel.

See what I'm talkin' about? Now that was about a man in New York, wants a 9 millimeter Smith & Wesson model 59-46. And why does he want it? 'Cause its the same gun that nigger in 'New York Undercover' uses. 'Cause of that nigger, I'm gonna make 12-50 off of this nigger.

Let me tell you how we're going to retaliate. All right? Tomorrow, I'm gonna pick you up, take you over to Century City, introduce you to my lawyer. And let me tell you something about my lawyer. This brother's name is Stacin Goins and this nigger is a junkyard dog. He my own personal Johnny Cochran. Matter of fact, he kicked Johnny Cochran's ass. And like Johnny Cochran, this nigger hate cops. I'm serious, man, he live to fuck wit de police. Now, as a favor, I had him look at your case and he say you ain't got shit to worry about. They're just fuckin' wit' chu. So we're gonna sick the junkyard dog on their ass and make 'em stop fuckin' wit' chu.

Now that you got 'em watchin' my ass, I'm gonna be in a titty bar downtown waitin' on Louis to call me and tell me everything's cool.