Abbie Porter

Abbie Porter Monologues

It's The Raincoats.

Yeah, it's like they've got this feeling, and they don't have any skill, and they don't want skill, because it's really interesting what happens when your passion is bigger than the tools you have to deal with it. It creates this energy that's raw. Isn't it great?

Whatever you think your life is going to be like, just know, it's not gonna be anything like that.

I gave him beer, and then I taught him how to verbally seduce women. Then we drove drunk, but I stopped that, and then he kissed Trish, and then we walked home.

You're not mad? You're mad.

You cannot let her sleep here if she's not having sex with you. It's disempowering.

I will stay in Santa Barbara. In just two years, I'll marry Dave. A month after I get married Carlotta will die. A week later, Max will die too. I will work out of my garage and show in local galleries. Against my doctor's advice, I will get pregnant, and by the time I'm thirty I'll have two boys.

They're a boy and a girl, and that they're monogamous for life, so if one of them dies, then the other one will die like a week later.

So I had this new idea for my photography that I was gonna take a picture of everything that I owned so it's a self-portrait of myself through the stuff that I have. Can I show you? So… bra, birth control, um, photography by Susan Sontag, shoes, underwear, a picture of a picture of my mom. I'm gonna do a bunch of 'em.

We have more monologues for You!