The Last King of Scotland Monologues

Based on the events of the brutal Ugandan dictator Idi Amin's regime as seen by his personal physician during the 1970s.

You are British?

Scottish? Ha! Ha! Why didn't you say so?… Great soldiers. Very brave. And good people. Completely. Let me tell you, if I could be anything instead of a Ugandan, I would be a Scot.

He. Except for the red hair, which I'm sure is attractive to your women, but which we Africans, we find is quite disgusting.

They take you to a tree and hang you by your skin. Each time you scream the evil comes out of you. Sometimes, it can take three days for your evil to be spent. Pull him up.

You promised to me you would help me build a new Uganda. You swore an oath.

Huh? Nothing? Nothing comes from nothing. You have a conscience, I know you do. That is why you came here in the first place. Or are you like all the other British. Just here to fuck and to take away? No? Why else would I trust you with my family? You are like my own son.

Your home… is here.

I want you to tell me what to do.

Yes, you are my advisor. You are the only one I can trust in here. You should have told me not to throw the Asians out, in the first place.

But you did not persuade me, Nicholas. You did not persuade me!

You dare try to poison me? After everything I gave you? I am Idi Amin! President-for-life and ruler of Uganda. I am the father of Africa.

Look at you. Is there one thing you have done that is good? Did you think this was all a game? 'I will go to Africa and I will play the white man with the natives.' Is that what you thought? We are not a game, Nicholas. We are real. This room here, it is real. I think your death will be the first real thing that has happened to you.

I am the father of this nation, Nicholas. And you have most... grossly... offended your father.

You see. You are a doctor and a philosopher. Yes, I do have a good life now. Please, please. Sit here. I come from a very poor family, I think you should know this. My father left me when I was a child. The British Army; became my home. They took me as a cleaner, in the kitchens, cleaning pots. They used to beat me.

"Beat this wall, Amin." "Dig the latreen, Amin." And now, here I am. The President of Uganda. And who put me here, huh? It was the British.

Because many of the people who, uh, broke relations with Israel, they are not only Muslims, they are also Christians. This particular certain point is very important…

Why did you try to kill me? Huh? I will not die until I say.

What you need, is to have some fun.

You see, Jonah? This is the sort of man a president needs around him. Someone who is not afraid to speak his mind.