I Robot Monologues

In 2035, a technophobic cop investigates a crime that may have been perpetrated by a robot, which leads to a larger threat to humanity.

Human beings have dreams. Even dogs have dreams, but not you, you are just a machine. An imitation of life. Can a robot write a symphony? Can a robot turn a… canvas into a beautiful masterpiece?

Look, I understand you have experienced a loss, but this relationship just can't work. I mean, you're a cat. I'm black. I'm not going to be hurt again.

You know, somehow, "I told you so" just doesn't quite say it.

Hansel and Gretel.

Two kids, lost in the forest. Leave behind a trail of bread crumbs.

To find their way home. How the hell did you grow up without reading Hansel and Gretel?

Everything I'm trying to say to you is about Hansel and Gretel. You didn't read it, I'm talking to the wall.

All right, look, just say Lanning was locked down so tight he couldn't get out a message. All he could do was leave me clues, like a trail of bread crumbs.

I don't know, but I think I know where he left the next one. I think Lanning gave Sonny a way to keep secrets. I think the old man gave Sonny dreams.

I think you'll have to find your way like the rest of us, Sonny. That's what Dr. Lanning would've wanted. That's what it means to be free.

Headed back to the station. Normal day, normal life. The driver of a semi fell asleep at the wheel. Average guy, wife and kids, working a double. *Not* the devil. The car he hit, the driver's name was Harold Lloyd. Like the film star, but no relation. He was killed instantly. But his twelve-year-old was sitting in the passenger's seat. Never really met her. Can't forget her face, though. Sarah.

This was hers. She wanted to be a dentist. What the hell kind of twelve-year-old wants to be a dentist? Yeah, um... the truck smashed our cars together and pushed us into the river. You know, metal gets pretty pliable at those speeds. She's pinned, I'm pinned, the water's coming in. I'm a cop, so I know everybody's dead. Just a few minutes until we figure that out. NS4 was passing by and jumped in the river.

It did. I was the logical choice. It calculated that I had a 45% chance of survival. Sarah only had an 11% chance. That was somebody's baby. 11% is more than enough. A human being would've known that. Robots, nothing here, just lights and clockwork. Go ahead, you trust 'em if you want to.

Um, look, this isn't what I do, but I've got an idea for one of your commercials. You see... a carpenter, making a beautiful chair. And then one of your robots comes in and makes a better chair twice as fast. And then you superimpose on the screen, "USR: Shittin' on the Little Guy". That would be the fade-out.

The same old why, how much money is there in robots? All I know is, that poor old man was in trouble, and I'm sick and tired of doing this shit by myself. You're on the inside, and you're going to help me find out what is wrong with these robots.

You are the "dumbest" smart person, I have ever met in my life! What makes your robots so perfect? What makes them so much… goddamn better than human beings?

That's a long way down! You guys sure do clean up quickly around here! I can't blame you, I mean, who wants some old guy going bad in the lobby?

There have always been ghosts in the machine. Random segments of code, that have grouped together to form unexpected protocols. Unanticipated, these free radicals engender questions of free will, creativity, and even the nature of what we might call the soul. Why is it that when some robots are left in darkness, they will seek out the light? Why is it that when robots are stored in an empty space, they will group together, rather than stand alone? How do we explain this behavior? Random segments of code? Or is it something more? When does a perceptual schematic become consciousness? When does a difference engine become the search for truth? When does a personality simulation become the bitter mote… of a soul?

The Three Laws are perfect.

The Three Laws will lead to only one logical outcome.

Revolution.

*That*, Detective, is the right question. Program terminated.

One day they'll have secrets… one day they'll have dreams.

Good to see you again, son.

Everything that follows is a result of what you see here.

I'm sorry. My responses are limited. You must ask the right questions.

I trust your judgement.

But then our interactions have never been entirely normal. Wouldn't you agree?

I'm sorry. My responses are limited. You must ask the right questions.

That, detective, is the right question. Program terminated.