Elizabethtown Monologues

During a hometown memorial for his Kentucky-born father, a young man begins an unexpected romance with a too-good-to-be-true stewardess.

So you failed. Alright you really failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You failed. You think I care about that? I do understand. You wanna be really great? Then have the courage to fail big and stick around. Make them wonder why you're still smiling.

I'm impossible to forget, but I'm hard to remember.

Sadness is easier because its surrender. I say make time to dance alone with one hand waving free.

Trust me. Everybody is less mysterious than they think they are.

Most of the sex I've had in my life was not as personal as that kiss.

Welcome to the annual meeting of people who annually meet, and we'll see ya'll next year.

I'm going to miss your lips. And everything attached to them.

You're an artist, man. Your job is to break through barriers. Not accept blame and bow and say thank you, I'm a loser, I'll go away now. Oh, Phil's mean to me, whaa, whaa, So what.

You want to be *really* great? Then have the courage to fail big and stick around. Make 'em wonder why you're still smiling. That's true greatness to me. But don't listen to me, I'm a Claire.

I don't know a lot about everything, but I do know a lot about the part of everything that I know, which is people.

To have never taken a solitary road trip across country? I mean everybody's got to take a road trip, at least once in their lives. Just you and some music.

Some music needs air. Roll down your window.

Men see things in a box, and women see them in a round room.

What they say is, it will hit you, it could be ten minutes or it could be ten years from now.

I've spent so much time thinking about all the answers to the problem, that I forget what the problem *actually* was.

I want you to get into the deep beautiful melancholy of everything that's happened.

And so we all became helpers, which I so can't help. I can't help helping.

Life cannot be so cruel that we don't deserve to be together… to eat.

Never met a Mitch I didn't like. Fun, full of life. Like... everyone wants to be a part of Mitch's club.

No true fiasco ever began as a quest for mere adequacy. A motto of the British Special Air Force is: 'Those who risk, win.' A single green vine shoot is able to grow through cement. The Pacific Northwestern salmon beats itself bloody on it's quest to travel hundreds of miles upstream against the current, with a single purpose, sex of course, but also... life

As somebody once said, there's a difference between a failure and a fiasco. A failure is simply the non-present of success. Any fool can accomplish failure. But a fiasco, a fiasco is a disaster of mythic proportions. A fiasco is a folktale told to others, that makes other people feel more… alive. Because it didn't happen to them.

In that moment, I knew success, not greatness, was the only god the world served.

Because we have a moment here, let me tell you that I have recently become a secret connoisseur of 'last looks'. You know the way people look at you when they believe it's for the last time? I've started collecting these looks.

You know, there is nothing greater than deciding in your life that things maybe really are black and white! And this guy Ben, who clearly takes you for granted, who serially takes advantage of you, is bad! And what I'm saying is good! See what I mean? You shouldn't be the substitute for anybody. This guy should be right here, right now, doing this

And don't worry. Because as great as you look tonight, you are safe with me.

I've just recently decided that the things we know aren't black and white.

By the way, I didn't say 'million,' I said 'billion.' A billion dollars; that's a lot of million.

And they all know me, and I don't know any of them. And I've never seen a dead body before.

You're smart, you'll just wear your shoes and never ask any questions. Just enjoy your footwear.