101 Dalmatians Monologues

An evil high-fashion designer plots to steal dalmatian puppies in order to make an extravagant fur coat but creates an extravagant mess instead.

More good women have been lost to marriage than to war, famine, disease and disaster. You have talent, darling. Don't squander it.

What kind of sycophant are you?

Shut up!

My business, my reputation, my life, has been ruined!

because you three incompetent twits let yourselves be outsmarted by a bunch of dumb animals!

And you call yourselves men? Huh? I've seen more intelligent pieces of carpet!

Alonzo. The drawing.

Take the drawing from Anita, and hand it to me! Is that difficult?

Thank you. Now go and stand somewhere until I need you.

Darling, red isn't your color. Give me the hat. Give me the hat, or you will become a hat. GIVE IT TO ME!

My faith in your limited intelligence is momentarily restored.

I live for fur, I worship fur. After all, is there a woman in all this wretched world who doesn't?

Mr. Skinner, suspicions are mounting. Police are everywhere. I want the job done tonight. Can you do it?

Any way you want. Poison them, drown them, bash them on the head. Got any chloroform? I don't care how you kill the little beasts, JUST DO IT, AND DO IT NOW!

Oh, yes! I love the smell of near extinction!

Be sure to let me know when the blessed event occurs.

The puppies, darling. I have no use for babies.

You… BEASTS! But I'm not beaten yet. You've won the battle, but I'm about to win the wardrobe. My spotty puppy coat is in plain sight and leaving tracks. In a moment I'll have what I came for, while all of you will end up as sausage meat, alone on some sad, plastic plate. Dead and meaty and red. No friends, no family, no pulse. Just slapped between two buns, smothered in onions, with fries on the side. Cruella De Vil has the last laugh!

All right. Keep the little beasts. Do what you like with them. Drown them, for all I care. You're a fool, Anita! I have no use for fools. You're fired, you're finished, you'll never work in fashion again! I'm through with all of you! I'll get even! Just wait. You'll be sorry. You fools! You IDIOTS!

Bingo!

Poor little things. I'm gonna cut you off, then cut you up!

And you must be Rufus.

This is extraordinary. I am reduced to tramping through SEWAGE! Because my two imbeciles can't keep track of a bunch of infant dogs!

Get down from there, and CATCH THOSE PUPPIES!

Well what can I say? Accidents will happen.