Robert McCall Monologues

When you pray for rain, you gotta deal with the mud too.

I’ve done some bad things in my life, Nicolai… Things I’m not proud of. I promised someone I love very much that I would never go back to being that person… But for you, I’ll make an exception.

Oh, it’s about a guy who thinks he’s a knight in shining armor. The only thing is, he lives in a world where knights don’t exist anymore.

That girl, Alana… She’s gonna go on living. You… You’re gonna bleed out all over this funky floor… All over 9,800 dollars.

The men I killed, your men… I gave them a chance, they made their decision… Now I’m giving you the opportunity to make yours.

My wife did. She… She was working through the 100 Books Everybody Should Read. She made it to 97, so I figured… I’d give it a shot… And one day we’d have something to talk about when we get together.

Take singing lessons. Then I’m gonna open a donut factory. I am… What? Why you laughing?

Tomorrow you’ll have returned all the money you extorted from those people. You’ll tell them it will never happen again. Do that, and this video will never be seen… Don’t, and a half an hour later you’ll watch the uncut version on every news outlet in the area. Now I’m offering you a chance to do the right thing. Take it.

There you go. Thank you very much. There you go. Mr. Pushkin thanks you very much. We’re going out of business. Closing down shop. Mr. Pushkin thanks you very much. There you are, sweetheart. Here you go. You’re welcome. Accept these parting gifts on behalf of Mr. Pushkin. There you go. Three, two… Look at that, perfect… One. Thank you. Thank you, sweetheart.

Your heart’s beating three times the normal rate because you’re losing so much blood. About 30 seconds, your body’s gonna shut down… and you’re gonna suffocate. Alina, the girl you beat half to death, her life will go on. Yours is gonna end right here, on this funky floor… over $9,800. You should have taken the money.

26 one-thousand… 27 one-thousand… 28 one-thousand… I’m sorry.

Why waste city services when I got two corrupt cops right in front of me?

Your hands. If you really work on power lines, your hands wouldn’t look like that. We gotta be waiting for somebody else.

What if that were me? You gonna leave me to die of smoke inhalation? I’m a buck-90. How you gonna pull me out of a burning building if you can’t pull a tire 20 yards?

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