James ‘Whitey’ Bulger Monologues

What did you marinate this steak in? Because it’s out of this world! You’re killing me with it!

Oh, come on! You got to tell me that! What’s the secret? Come on, you can do it, come on, that is one of the best goddamn steaks I have ever had in my entire life. What’s the family secret recipe?

That’s it?

I thought it was a family secret.

No, no. You said to me this is a family secret, and you gave it up to me, boom just like that. You spill the secret family recipe today, maybe you spill a little something about me tomorrow, hm?

You were just saying? “Just saying” gets people sent away. “Just saying” got me a nine-year stretch in Alcatraz, you understand? So, “just saying” can get you buried real quick.

Look at his face!

Take your shot, but make it your best. ‘Cause I get up, I eat ya.

Morris… me and you gotta have a sit dowm about something… what the fuck did you marinate this steak in ’cause it’s outta this world! You’re killin’ me with this.

I gotta knife here. Ah, c’mon, you can do it. What’s the secret family recipe? C’mon, what’s the secret?

No… no. You said this was a family secret and you gave it to me boom just like fuckin’ that. You spill the secret family recipe today, maybe you fuckin’ spill a lil’ somethin’ about me tomorrow. Am I right in assuming that?

Don’t look to John… he can’t fuckin help you.

Oh you were just sayin’? Just sayin’ get people sent to Allenwood. Just sayin’ got me a nine year stretch in Levinworth and Alcatraz, do you understand? So… just sayin’ can get you buried real fuckin’ quick.

Look at his fuckin’ face! Hey! I’m just fuckin’ with you. It’s a fuckin’ recipe! Couldn’t give a shit! Tastes great, I’m fuckin’ with you.

Just gettin’ started.

…I need you to listen very carefully to what I am saying because there are lessons throughout your whole life. And you gotta learn from these things, right? Here’s the deal. You did not get in trouble because you punched this sneaky brat in the face, not at all. You got in trouble because you punched this sneaky little brat in the face in front of other people.

No, that’s absolutely what I should be tellin’ him, babe. So the lesson you gotta learn is this, it’s not what you do, it’s when and where you do it. And who you do it to or with. Huh? You follow?

That’s exactly right.

If nobody sees it, it didn’t happen.

Hey, you know something?

For 15 straight minutes, I been watching you putting your big fat fuckin’ fingers into your disgusting mouth, which is filled with God knows what kind of fuckin’ bacteria, and then you take the same big fat fuckin’ filthy fingers and you stuff ’em back into the bowl that is there for public consumption. Now what the fuck are you thinkin’,John?

Just don’t do it again.

Fuck you. You always have a choice. You just happened to make the wrong fucking one.

I gotta tell you something, Officer Flynn. It’s a sad day when a native son takes up with his oppressor. There’s a word for that back home, you know. Penalty’s death.

The last thing I would do if I was planning to harm you was was to warn you in advance, you dumb fuck.

You better fuck yourself, Flynn.

Aw, Debbie, you’re breaking my fuckin’ heart.

You need to control. Because you know the game surprises you. And you bite your ass not know when, you know?

Lots of good your vest did you today, you fuckin’ prick.

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