I’ve got the guts to die. What I want to know is, have you got the guts to live?
What’s that smell in this room? Didn’t you notice it, Brick? Didn’t you notice a powerful and obnoxious odor of mendacity in this room?
There ain’t nothin’ more powerful than the odor of mendacity!
This was what my father left me, this lousy old suitcase! And on the inside was nothing, nothing but his uniform from the Spanish-American war. That was his legacy to me! Nothing at all! And I built this place from nothing.
He was a hobo, the best-known tramp on the boxcar circuit. He’d worked once in awhile as a field hand, and I’d tag along. Sat on my bare bottom in the dirt, waiting for him. Outside of hunger, the first thing I remember is shame. I was ashamed of that miserable old tramp. I was riding boxcars with him when I was nine, something you never had to do. You’ll never have to bury me the way I buried him. I buried him in a meadow alongside a railroad track. He was running to catch a freight and his heart give out. You know something? That old tramp died laughing.
But it’s always there in the mornin’, ain’t it? The truth and it’s here right now! You’re just feeling sorry for yourself; that’s all it is! Self-pity!You didn’t kill Skipper. He killed himself. You and Skipper and millions like you are living in a kids’ world. Playing games, touchdowns, no worries, no responsibilities. Life ain’t no damn football game. Life ain’t just a buncha high spots.You’re a thirty-year-old kid. Soon you’ll be a fifty-year-old kid. Pretendin’ you’re hearin’ cheers when there ain’t any. Dreamin’ and drinkin’ your life away. Heroes in the real world live twenty-four hours a day, not just two hours in a game. Mendacity! You won’t…You won’t live with mendacity? Well, you’re an expert at it! The truth is pain and sweat and payin’ bills and makin’ love to a woman that you don’t love any more. Truth is dreams that don’t come true, and nobody prints your name in the paper ’til you die.
It’ll kill the senses too! You… you got pain – at least you know you’re alive. It’s easin’ somewhat now. When you got pain, it’s better to judge yourself of a lot of things. I’m not gonna stupify myself with that stuff. I wanna think clear. I want to see everything, and I want to feel everything. Then I won’t mind goin’. I’ve got the guts to die. What I want to know – do you have the guts to live?
The human animal is a beast that must die. If he’s got money, he buys and buys and buys everything he can, in the crazy hope one of those things will be life-everlasting, which it can never be. I’ve suddenly noticed you don’t call me Big Daddy anymore. If you needed a big daddy, why didn’t you come to me? If you needed someone to lean on, why Skipper? Why not me? I’m your father! Why didn’t you come to your kinfolk, the people that love you?
I’m gonna pick me a choice woman and I’m gonna smother her in minks and choke her with diamonds. Boy, I’m gonna be happy.
Would ya look at all this stuff? Bought most of it when I took your mother to Europe on that Cook’s Tour. Never had such a lousy time in my life. I tell you that Europe ain’t nothin’ but a wore-out auction, just a great big fire sale, the whole rotten thing. Boy, Big Mama just wild in it, and she just bought and bought and bought. Sure is lucky I’m a rich man, yes, sirree, sure is lucky. Got any idea how much I’m worth, son? Ask Gooper. He knows. He knows to the penny ‘less I missed my guess. Close on ten million dollars in cash and blue chip stocks besides twenty-eight thousand of the richest acres this side of the Valley Nile.
