Dwayne Monologues

You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. School, then college, then work… Fuck that. And fuck the Air Force Academy. If I want to fly, I’ll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest.

I wish I could just sleep until I was eighteen and skip all this crap-high school and everything-just skip it.

You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. You know, school, then college, then work, fuck that. And fuck the air force academy. If I wanna fly, I’ll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest.

No, you’re *not* my family! I don’t wanna *be* your family! I hate you fucking people! Divorce? Bankrupt? Suicide? You’re fucking losers, you’re losers! No, please just leave me here, Mom. Please, please, please. Please… just leave me here.

No, you’re *not* my family, okay? I don’t want to *be* your family! I *hate* you fucking people! *I hate you!* Divorce? Bankrupt? Suicide? You’re fucking *losers*! You are losers!

No, *please* just leave me here, Mom. Okay? Please, *please*. Please just leave me here.

I apologize for the things I said. I was upset, and I didn’t really mean them.

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