Click Monologues

A workaholic architect finds a universal remote that allows him to fast-forward and rewind to different parts of his life. Complications arise when the remote starts to overrule his choices.

I was looking at our proposal. You know what? After getting to know you a little bit, I realize this is not what you're all about. In fact, let's just throw it out, all right. The river in the lobby idea, what an egghead move. Let's just keep all the plans simple, forget all the niceties, and maximize our revenue. That's what its all about anyways, the profits. But do me a favor. Just give us your account and your trust. That way we can get the hell out of this dump, go to a T.G.I. Friday's, and do some Jell-O shots 'til this guy pukes up a lung.

Like I Said, "Good Guys Need A Break". I know you'll do the right thing this time. Love Morty. P.S. Your Wife's Rockin' Body Still Drives Me Crazy.

I guess when you combine mass quantities of cough syrup with yodels... you get acid.

I promise, I'm not going to work tonight, I'm going to stay home with you, and we're going to watch Dragon Tales.

You've gotta show me how you do the quarter trick, it's driving me crazy!

You can come over tomorrow night and the next night and the next night and whenever you want!

Twinkie. Don't need it. You don't need it, man. You do need a Yodel, though. Good job.

I - I did. I did. I - John, I just feel would should stop on wasting our energy on corporate brown nosing, and worrying who's got the better suit. Armani, Calvin Klein. Who cares? Let's concentrate on what really matters. The work.

Ben, I promise you I'm going to finish the tree house and we are going to sleep in it next weekend! And you and I are going to exercise together and I'm not gonna wear a speedo!

Donna, I'm not out there drinking or gambling or hitting on chicks, I'm working my ass off so that my family can have a better life than I ever dreamed of having when I was a kid. And the only way for that to happen is for me to watch the freaking show! So relax, hon!

Linger by the Cranberries was the song playing during our first kiss, and you looked so hot in that pink sweater.

Yeah, I remember what Janine was wearing, she scared the shit out of me then!

Michael, like I said, good guys need a break. I know you'll do the right thing this time. Love, Morty P.S. Your wife's rockin' body still drives me crazy.